Wow, two posts in two days! This is a record! Everyone else has been blogging, tweeting, commenting on news articles, and talking about the royal birth. I figured I might as well too. I was all set to go to bed at midnight, which for me is early, but I had to check something on the computer and then all of a sudden I found myself feeling the sudden urge to blog about the royal birth.
Was I obsessed as some people were about Kate and William and their much-anticipated prince or princess? No, not really. Then why am I blogging about it? Well, for one thing, I’m annoyed. From morning til night, all I saw in my Facebook feed were comments about the royal birth. Let me clarify. I’m not so much annoyed by the amount of coverage as I am about the number of people that are annoyed about the amount of coverage and the nasty ol’ things that they had to say about it all.
As with everything including politics and religion, there will be the extreme camps. In this case, you have the people who don’t give a rat’s butt about the royal family, angry that we are focusing so much on a baby’s birth (something that happens every second around the world) instead of more relevant issues like the state of our country and our economy, insisting that no one here gives a hoot (but plenty of people around the world and in this country do give a hoot or else why would there be such excessive coverage?). While the other extreme camp has gone on and on and on for weeks leading up to the childbirth to try to predict the baby’s sex and what the baby’s name will be. And then you’ll have what I refer to as the neutral camp who just want to go with the flow and carry on with their daily routines and not really care about the coverage in the news about the royal family.
I happen to belong to the neutral camp. That is, until I was triggered. What was I triggered by? But of course, the meanness in people. Meanness that stems from ignorance! Yes, I stumbled across some mean comments/tweets on today’s Christian Monitor article titled “First glimpse of British prince brings comments about mom’s postpartum body.” As soon as I saw the title, I thought to myself “Do I honestly want to see the comments, which will no doubt be extremely ignorant and dumb, to put it mildly?” I braced myself and read through the comments and quickly grew infuriated. When I saw Kate and William walk through the hospital door earlier in the day to introduce their baby to the world, I instantly thought “Uh boy, Kate is still showing her bump, and I will bet you any amount of money that that will be the cause of a lot of mean-spirited comments from a public that is already weary of the extensive coverage about the royal birth.” And here we are.
People calling her fat. <– omg, Kate, fat? What, are these people nuts? If she’s fat, then that makes me an elephant. Ridiculous.
People joking that it looks like she’s still pregnant. <– Well, duh….this is how ALL mothers look after they have a baby. And all mothers and their husbands/significant others know this because they have been through this themselves and know that you simply don’t blink away the belly that has been carrying a baby for the past 9 months. It’s just NOT POSSIBLE. What do people think really happens after childbirth, anyway? That the entire contents of the belly simply come out with the baby, and that’s it? What about all the skin and muscle that have had to stretch over the course of 9 months to accommodate the growing baby?! I may have dropped my weight rapidly, thanks to the postpartum depression (PPD) that caused me to UNWILLINGLY lose my appetite and not want to eat anything for several weeks….this, after being literally starved for a week in the hospital after having my baby because my doctor wanted me to be prepared to go into surgery at any moment’s notice, thanks to my placenta accreta. BUT I still had a residual belly when I left the hospital.
People joking that perhaps there’s still a twin in there. <– This is such a stupid comment that I’m not even going to address this.
What these idiotic comments show is that the image of a perfect postpartum body–thanks to celebrities and their personal trainers and not showing themselves in public until their tummies are gone–that the media focuses unhealthily on is causing the general public to have this unrealistic expectation of mothers all miraculously ridding themselves of their bellies and returning to their pre-pregnancy bodies immediately after they give birth. I have blogged about this previously, and I’m actually quite sick and tired of this…I really am.
So, if women who have been through pregnancy can all vouch for the fact that the rapid return to pre-pregnancy selves is a myth, then why does this false perception continue to exist? I’ll tell you why. Because they don’t want others to know about their struggles to return to their pre-pregnancy selves, much like mothers who have suffered from PPD don’t want others to know out of feelings of guilt and shame that they didn’t experience the perfect childbirth experience they’ve been longing to have and society expects all mothers to have.
So…..with mothers not speaking up, the only examples we see are the celebrities flaunting their perfectly fit, postpartum bodies for all the world to see. Therein lies the problem that we continuously and persistently perpetuate in one annoying, vicious cycle.
Last night, I saw a USA Today article titled “Will and Kate: New parents face joy, challenges” come up in my Facebook feed. At first glance, when I saw that it was another article about the pending royal birth, I was going to skip it. But then I saw who was interviewed for it. My friend Dr. Diane Sanford, psychologist in St. Louis and co-author of Life Will Never Be the Same: The Real Mom’s Postpartum Survival Guide. I read it, and I was quite pleased to find that it offers refreshingly REALISTIC information about what Kate and William–like all other parents–should expect when it comes to becoming a mom and dad for the first time. It was, quite frankly, a really great platform to educate on the realities of having a baby and parenthood…after all, it’s an article about the ROYAL BIRTH in USA Today, and bound to generate a good number of views. So, I applaud the fact that Dr. Sanford was called upon as a resource for educating the public. It’s NOT just an article about the royal family’s baby boy.
I can only pray that, over time, the number of smart articles educating the public about the realities of pregnancy, childbirth and the postpartum period will increase so there will be fewer articles spreading false perceptions of what it’s like to have a baby. More education will mean less idiotic remarks like the ones people have been making about the Duchess…who by the way, was brave for showing the world her REAL postpartum body!