Go See Tully, and Let’s Talk

Just a quick post tonight with a movie review of “Tully” written by a friend of mine, Mrs. W.

Initially, Mrs. W was annoyed like I was about the movie’s apparent failures based on a couple of negative movie reviews she and I both read this past weekend.  Like me, she did not want to see the movie.  That is, until I sent her the review from a postpartum psychosis survivor, Melissa Bangs, who happens to be the star of her own one-woman show “Playing Monopoly with God” that’s been on tour for the past couple of years and is headed to New York City next week!  Reading this positive review of someone who is a PPP survivor peaked Mrs. W’s interest, and so she went to see “Tully” yesterday.  Please take a moment to read Melissa’s personal thoughts from the perspective of an actual PPP survivor!

Without further ado, here’s Mrs. W’s movie review:

“Ok. So I saw it tonight………….

  1. There are a couple triggering scenes.  One of them was in the first half of the movie, which almost caused me to leave because my whole body got amped up like I was going to have an anxiety attack.  But I calmed myself down and was able to sit through the last half of the movie, which was less emotionally jarring.
  2. I don’t want to spoil the movie, but I will say that the main character definitely has postpartum psychosis but no one ever says it outright.  There are a few things said (like when her husband told the doc she was depressed with their second child) that might mislead people to think she has postpartum depression (PPD), but I think the movie left out the actual diagnosis on purpose because it wants the audience to figure it out on their own.  However, I do think the movie shines a light on postpartum mental health and how a struggling mother could slip through the cracks …to the point that even a husband who doesn’t pay close attention would fail to notice his wife’s condition.
  3. It is a shame that the doctor in the movie doesn’t say it outright that she has PPP.  It was definitely a missed opportunity to shed light on the subject no one talks about.
  4. Also, Charlize Theron played the heck out of that role.”

Hmmmm, it’s interesting that Mrs. W thinks the film makers deliberately left out the diagnosis of PPP to cause the audience to want to figure it out on their own.  I, on the other hand, don’t have such an optimistic perspective and in this case would not give the film makers such credit for the reasons stated in my blog post about Tully.  What the movie and the subsequent posts on social media has done, at least in the maternal mental health circle, is promote discussion about maternal mental health.  But that’s within the already existing circles of advocates, mental healthcare practitioners, and survivors.  I haven’t really heard much about discussions going on among the general public, which is why first and foremost we must capture the proper message about maternal mental health conditions (and bust stigmas associated with them) to educate people, share widely and DISCUSS!  THIS is why I am still annoyed about the lost opportunity to educate the public.  The film makers could have easily inserted a diagnosis into the screenplay.  But they didn’t.

Anyway, the whole point of this post is to weigh different perspectives and not let a couple of negative movie reviews completely shut off all interest in seeing a movie.  Just as Mrs. W had done, she started out with an opinion that was formed based on a couple of negative reviews of people (not really clear if they themselves were PPD or PPP survivors) who did see the movie.  Because of these negative reviews, she was annoyed and had zero interest in seeing the movie.  After I showed her Melissa’s review, she went to see it and was able to form her own opinion after seeing it.  Then she shared with me her thoughts about the movie.

Mrs. W did confirm that the movie:

  1. Puts a light on maternal mental health in terms of mothers’ struggles being real and women like Tully falling through the cracks due to lack of awareness and lack of support from significant others and loved ones.  Motherhood is not easy.  A mother who is struggling will fall through the cracks if she doesn’t get the help she needs.  New mothers need practical/emotional help during the first couple of months.  Forget about the whole supermom thing.
  2. Falls short in raising awareness that postpartum mood disorders are experienced by 1 out of 7 mothers and definitely not anything to be ashamed of.  They are very real, serious, painful to experience, and life-changing.

And yes, Charlize Theron plays the heck out of ANY role she plays.  But for me, even if Charlize earns an Oscar nom, I still can’t set aside my annoyance (that I blogged about previously) to see it.  As a person of principle, I would not want to pay even $1 to watch a movie that fails an opportunity to educate the population properly by sending unclear signals on the condition Tully really suffered from.  To each his/her own, as they say…..

 

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Playing Monopoly with God – New York City Performances!

I am super excited to share the news that “Playing Monopoly With God” is coming to New York City! (Unfortunately, I won’t be able to make it due to prior commitments).

“Playing Monopoly With God” is an amazing, one-woman play.  Melissa Bangs is the talented and passionate actress behind this play.

Her mission is to share her experience and in so doing, spread awareness on what it’s like to be one of the 20% of new mothers who suffer from postpartum mood disorders and encourage mothers to share their experiences.

Melissa has been touring for 4 years putting on 37 shows—including sold-out shows in Seattle and Los Angeles– reaching nearly 5000 people

♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦♦

Postpartum Support International presents:

Playing Monopoly with God & Other True Stories
Hilarious. Heart-wrenching. Human. 
A true tale of childbirth, madness and the journey home.
LIVE. NONFICTION. STORYTELLING. PERFORMANCE.
 
TICKETS ON SALE NOW!!! MAY 17th – 20th

Evening
 Performances – 6PM Doors – 7PM Performance
THE RATTLESTICK THEATRE @ 224 Waverly Place, New York, New York
Thursday, May 17th – Live Performance followed by a PSI Gala Event at Bobo NYC ($175)
Friday, May 18th – Live Performance w Wine, Cheese and Panel Discussion ($75)
Saturday, May 19th – Live Performance (also to be webcast) ($45 in-person)
and a Mimosa Matinee…
Sunday, May 20th – 1PM Doors/2PM Show ($45)
 
In September 2012, at 40 years old, Melissa Bangs gave birth to her beautiful daughter Adelaide.  A month later, dramatically hormone depleted and sleep deprived, Melissa is admitted to the Providence Psychiatric Facilities in a complete manic state.  After nearly a month, she is sent home with a bipolar diagnosis and on lithium.  What comes next is an extraordinary journey.
 
On her path back to wholeness, one of the things Bangs did was read her entire 100 plus page hospital record.  Somewhere, around page 87, there is a nurse’s note that looks as if it were scribbled late at night after a long shift.  It reads, “Patient says she will do comedy on this experience.”  Upon reading this, Bangs laughed out loud.  
 
The psych team couldn’t have possibly known that Bangs has been a storyteller her entire life and did comedy for a stint, as a student, at the Upright Citizens’ Brigade in New York City.  They couldn’t have known that transforming details from the most painful experience of her life into a room full of laughter would prove healing for so many.
 

Join Postpartum Support International for an evening of storytelling full of bewilderment, chaos and hilarity.  Bangs has a knack for telling true stories that cut to the bone of our shared, vulnerable human condition. Her true gift, however, comes in the moments in which she’s able to strip away the shame or agony of an experience and transform the room into an uproar of laughter.