A PPD/PPA Survivor’s Experience During the Coronavirus Outbreak

A brief note from Ivy:

Ever since the whole coronavirus thing started impacting us here in the U.S., I’ve been starting my emails and calls to friends, colleagues and clients with “I hope you are doing well.”

For those who read this post, I hope you ARE doing well.  The past couple of weeks have been a period of great uncertainty and adjustment for all of us.  I’ve been trying very hard to go with the flow and not to be overly anxious about what’s going on and the fear that I and members of my family would fall ill with the coronavirus.

It is normal to be anxious.  During this period of uncertainty and anxiety, remember to use your coping skills.  Breathe, listen to music, read a book, connect with people via Facetime, Zoom, Facebook, or any of the other numerous apps out there.  Even churches have been holding online services.

If you are struggling, visit this site to learn some things you can do to take care of your mental health in the face of uncertainty.  You may also call the national Disaster Distress Helpline ( 24/7) at 800-985-5990 for emotional support and crisis counseling if you are experiencing distress or other mental health concerns.  Calls are answered by trained counselors who will listen to your concerns, explore coping and other available supports, and offer referrals to community resources for follow-up care and support.

If you are a new or expectant mom or even a mom who has had a postpartum mood disorder in the past, you know you can rely on the support of Postpartum Support International volunteers and staff to support you if you are feeling anxious. PSI provides support to mothers and their families every day via 800-944-4773 or text 503-894-9453 (Eng) or 971-420-0294 (Español). Additionally, PSI’s free online support groups meet every Tuesday (and now every Thursday as well).  Meet other moms virtually, share your story, build a community and hang out with other moms! Find info on timings and register here.  Please also like the PSI Facebook page for daily updates, including changes to frequency of online support groups.

Stay healthy and safe.

Warmly,
Ivy

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And here is my friend Stacy M’s experience during the coronavirus situation:

Tonight G said something that stopped me in my tracks. I’ve worried so much about regression with him.

At dinner, he announced:”You know I used to do this funny thing where I lined up all my animals on the steps all the time and it was so weird. I don’t know why I would do such a thing.”

I have tons of pictures on our iCloud when he would stim and line his dolls up in his own special way.  We never interfered with what he was doing and just let him run with it. We were always so careful to avoid knocking anything out of place.  We would leave his masterpieces around for days and days.

He has slowly outgrown this behavior. It’s been a while since he has lined things up. I didn’t even realize it….until now.

Now, with the whole coronavirus situation and with schools being closed, life has changed so much these past two weeks.  I have been worrying about what I would do if I had to step in for his teachers and do everything they’ve been doing that have helped him so much.

I was a broken soul his first two little years of life when I suffered terribly with severe postpartum depression (PPD) and postpartum anxiety (PPA).  I was crippled by PPD/PPA for some time.  It’s been 6 years since I felt the kind of despair that I felt when I suffered from PPD/PPA.  PPD/PPA paralyzed me so much that I was even afraid to hold my children (G has a twin sister) for the first year.

Then, when I noticed that G was showing signs of autism around 9 months old, the only way I knew I could help him was to secure as much help as I could with his autism. Even though I felt broken, as long as I had the right help for G, things would be fine.  I have always hated asking for help, but for my sake and for G’s sake, I had to let help in and let help heal us. Once I finally got my feet on the ground, I did better and so did G. We have been making progress and thriving ever since.

However, now with this new way of life of social distancing due to the coronavirus, I have been hit with a wave of feelings that brought me back to the days when I had PPD/PPA. Being a mother during these times is really tough. It’s not the kind of world I ever imagined my family and I would ever have to experience. I have done everything in my strength to be able to function well again.  But now, I’ve been experiencing waves of uncertainty from fear of the unknown, as I (along with everyone else around me) have never experienced what we are now experiencing.  The sudden turn of events requiring everyone to stop going to work, stop going to school, stop getting together with friends and relatives, and even stop going out unless we really had to caught everyone off-guard.  No one could prepare for any of this.

I’ve been having some tears build up for days now.  But I take deep breaths daily.  I’m taking one day at a time.  I have learned that I CAN teach my children from home. I have learned that I CAN manage this.  I HAVE been managing.

The fact that G could reflect on such behavior tonight made me feel so proud of myself and of him that we’ve come so far despite all the obstacles.

What I want to tell other new mothers and mothers to be is to not be afraid to ask for help and to rely on a support system.

It is important to communicate and put one foot in front of the other, one step and one day at a time.

It will all make sense again. It’s okay to be scared, it’s okay to cry right now, and it’s okay to talk about your fears and get them off your chest.

We may be quarantined but there are many online support groups that can help while we still need to maintain social distancing.

You are never alone.

– Stacy M

Lunafest in West Orange, NJ on September 13, 2019 Benefit for Postpartum Support International

If you live in New Jersey, please consider attending LUNAFEST proudly presented by the New Jersey Chapter of Postpartum Support International (PSI).

When: Friday, September 13, 2019 at 7:00-10:00 pm

Where: Luna Stage at 555 Valley Rd, West Orange, NJ

Tickets:  $25 includes a complimentary cocktail.  To buy, click here.

About:  Since 2000, LUNAFEST has showcased a collection of short films by, for, and about women. Discover the ground-breaking work of female filmmakers who are changing the industry with this year’s lineup of eight short films.  Your support of Lunafest will not only help flip the script of the 2.13 : 1 ratio of male to female short-film directors in this country, but help raise money for local women’s causes.

Proceeds of this particular screening event will benefit the NJ Chapter of PSI.  PSI’s mission is to promote awareness, prevention and treatment of mental health issues related to childbearing.  The long-term goals of the PSI-NJ chapter is to create, throughout the state of New Jersey, a unified voice for the support, education and care of moms and families with perinatal mood disorders, as well as law enforcement and health care professionals.  support mothers (and even fathers) suffering from it.

If you support women’s causes and want to support mothers (and their families) who suffer from postpartum mood and anxiety disorders (e.g, postpartum depression (PPD), postpartum OCD and postpartum psychosis) to get the help they need, please consider coming to Lunafest and sharing with friends, family members, neighbors, and colleagues and even share widely on social media.

There will be information about PSI, PSI-NJ and other maternal mental health services in NJ at this event.

 

 

 

 

 

The 32nd Annual Postpartum Support International Conference

I think everyone has friends that you can go a while without seeing and when you do see each other again, it’s like you’d never really been apart.  I have a few friends like this in the perinatal mood disorder (PMAD) world.   And that circle keeps growing each time I attend the annual Postpartum Support International (PSI) conference.

In the past 13 years, I have attended 7 of what my dear friend, Pec Indman (co-author with Shoshana Bennett, PhD, of Beyond the Blues: Understanding and Treating Prenatal and Postpartum Depression & Anxiety), refers to as “family reunions” and with good reason!  We are like family.  For me, it’s my tribe.  My very first conference was in New Jersey back in 2006, followed by Kansas City (KS) in 2007, Pittsburgh in 2010, Seattle in 2011, Minneapolis in 2013, Philadelphia in 2017, and Portland (OR) four weeks ago.  I generally feel a natural affinity to other PSI members because we are all for the most part postpartum mood disorder (PMD) survivors and/or are PMD advocates.  Nearly all work with PMD moms/families as a medical or mental healthcare practitioners, and that’s where I’m different from them.  But my mind keeps going back to it as a possibility of switching gears one day down the road.

The 32nd annual PSI conference took place June 26-30 this year in Portland, Oregon.  At this conference, I heard some of what I already learned about previously and some new things I hadn’t heard much about previously–e.g., EMDR (eye movement desensitization and reprocessing) and brainspotting.  One of the keynote speakers was Lee Cohen, MD, director of the Ammon-Pinozzotto Center for Women’s Mental Health, Massachusetts General Hospital, as well as Professor of Psychiatry at Harvard Medical School. Dr. Cohen is a national and international leader in the field of women’s mental health, and is widely published with over 200 original research articles and book chapters in the area of perinatal and reproductive psychiatry.

The fact that there were over 700 attendees over the course of the 4-day conference was awesome!  It gave me the goosebumps!  We were excited to see an unprecedented increase in the number of attendees, which can only mean one thing:   more people than ever before know about PSI and its mission and share the mission to effect change when it comes to postpartum outcomes.  This is awesome!  Now, if only we can get more OB/GYNs and nurses to attend!  Find a way to give them some sort of continuing ed credits….an additional bit of motivation to come to these conferences!  Being able to properly recognize, diagnose, and treat PMDs is still an unnecessarily huge hurdle for all too many doctors around the country.

At this conference, I sat side by side at the bookstore at 7:30 am on each of the first 2 days of the conference with a young man from Zimbabwe.  We were both volunteers for that early morning shift.  Linos was one of only a handful of men who attended the conference, the first representative from that country to ever attend a PSI conference, and one of the ones who traveled farthest to get to Portland.  You can tell he was on a mission to effect change in his country.  One of his top missions this year is to help raise funds for Zimbabwe’s first PSI Climb Out of the Darkness event.  Climb Out of the Darkness is the world’s largest event for raising awareness of perinatal mood and anxiety disorders, while raising money and building community.

I just donated to Team Zimbabwe.
Go Team Zimbabwe!

Funds from this Climb Out will go towards the 2nd international Society for Pre and Post Natal Services (SPANS) conference on Maternal Mental Health in Africa in September 2019.  The conference theme this year is “Incorporating Mental Health into Maternal, Paternal and Child Health to improve outcomes.”  Linos and Team Zimbabwe hope to bring participants from many parts of the continent to further African awareness and to improve the accessibility, affordability, timely and essential maternal and paternal services, as well as assist in the raising of awareness of Infant, perinatal and paternal to improve the health of mothers, children and the families at large.  Every penny of your generosity will ultimately make a huge impact on the welfare of families impacted by maternal mental health issues.  Thank you very much.

You are not alone. You are not to blame. With help, you will be well.
If you or someone you know is suffering, PSI can help.
Call 1.800.994.4773 or
Text 503.894.9453

Elly Taylor of Becoming Us and her 2019 Seed Planting Workshop U.S. Tour

My friend, Elly Taylor, is an Australian relationship counselor, author of the book Becoming Us, and founder of an organization of the same name, which she created to teach professionals and support mothers and their partners.  Both the book and organization’s mission is to help the mother and partner navigate the peaks and valleys of the parenting journey via 8 essential steps that Becoming Us as “map, compass and travel guide all in one.”

Elly and I have a bunch of things in common.  We are both postpartum depression (PPD) survivors and book authors (though hers is award winning).  We were both blindsided by PPD and the challenges of parenting.  We are both members of Postpartum Support International.  Elly loves NYC (where I’ve spent the last 30 years working) as much as if not more than I love Sydney (where she lives).  She is fortunate enough to be out here in NYC each year for the past 4 years on Becoming Us-related reasons; whereas, I’ve been back to Sydney 3x in the past 22 years (I so wish I could return more often!).

Elly will be here in the states for her “Seed Planting” workshop tour in Los Angeles, Denver, Chicago, and New York City.  For the complete schedule and how to register, click here.  If you live near those areas and are a couple or family therapist, birth professional, infant or child mental health professional, and anyone else who works with expecting, new or not so new parent, sign up for Elly’s 2-hour interactive seed-planting workshop.

The training will teach you:

  1. how the groundbreaking research- and evidence-based Becoming Us approach can support you to work with mothers/fathers/partners to navigate the different transitions to parenthood, reduce risks for postpartum mood disorders, and support families to thrive
  2. what the transitions are (there are more than 8!), how they can negatively impact mothers and their families
  3. how to plant Becoming Us “seeds” that reduce risk for the most common parenthood problems including perinatal mental health issues and relationship distress
  4. how you can apply the model to your work with parents at any stage of their family life cycle

Then, in Atlanta, Elly will also hold a breakout session/seminar at the CAPPA Conference taking place from June 21-23.  See the CAPPA website for more info and to register.

Additionally, she will hold a breakout session/seminar at this year’s Postpartum Support International conference in Portland, Oregon.  It will take place on June 30th from 9am-noon.  See the PSI Conference website for more details about the conference and how to register.

Free Screening of Not Carol and Panel Discussion – Scotch Plains, NJ on May 29, 2019

If you live in New Jersey, please consider attending this screening of Not Carol, a feature-length documentary about the Carol Coronado case from 2014.  I’d blogged about it here and here.  And in searching for her current status just now (I was hoping there’d be news that would be more positive than that she was spending the rest of her life in prison without parole), I found this article featuring Joy Burkhard of 2020Mom  and her advocacy for Carol and other moms.  Carol’s case is another example of a tragic loss resulting from a postpartum mood disorder, in this case postpartum psychosis.

What:  Free Screening of Not Carol

Why:  Learn about postpartum depression (PPD), its symptoms and how to support mothers (and even fathers) suffering from it.  Public awareness initiatives like this one can help reduce stigma and ensure mothers suffering from a postpartum mood disorder, like PPD or postpartum psychosis, get the help they need.  We must ensure future cases like Carol’s will never happen again.  Note: this screening is not just intended for doctors/psychiatrists/social workers that work with new moms.  You can be a survivor, advocate, or simply a concerned citizen who may or may not know someone in your life that has suffered/is currently suffering from a postpartum mood disorder.

When: Wednesday, May 29 at 7:30 p.m.

Where: Scotch Plains JCC, 1391 Martine Avenue, Scotch Plains, NJ 07076

RSVP: Courtney Teicher via cteicher@jccng.org or 908-889-8800 x227

After the film there will be a panel discussion comprised of the following individuals (note that Dr Birndorf and Dr. Levine were on The Today Show on August 3, 2018, which focused on Dr. Levine’s experience as a new father with PPD.  Click here for my blog post about that):

  • Film Executive Producers: Eamon Harrington and Veronica Brady
  • David Levine, MD:  Summit Medical Group physician
  • Catherine Birndorf, MD – Clinical Associate Professor of Psychiatry and Obstetrics/Gynecology and founding director of the Payne Whitney Women’s Program at The New York Presbyterian Hospital – Weill Cornell Medical Center in Manhattan.  She is also a co-founder of The Motherhood Center).  I’d met her previously at a Postpartum Support International (PSI) conference.

Speaking of PSI, there will be information and individuals on-hand to provide information about the non-profit international organization.

 

 

A Must for All New Jersey Medical/Mental Maternal Healthcare Practitioners, Doulas, Midwives, etc.

After a two-month dry spell in posting on my blog due to lots going on at home and at work, here I am briefly to help spread the word for the Postpartum Support International 2-day training on November 15-16, 2018 in Fort Lee, New Jersey:  Perinatal Mood Disorders: Components of Care. 

Led by PSI’s very own Birdie Gunyon Meyer, RN, MA (whom I’ve known since I became a member in 2006), Lisa Tremayne, RN, CPPD, CBC, and Joanna Cole, PHD, it is a critical training intended not just for mental health care practitioners but anyone and everyone who would ever need to care for an expectant or new mother.  That includes obstetricians/gynecologists, general practitioners, pediatricians, doulas, midwives, nurses, ER doctors and their staff, etc.

You can visit the site that goes over the training objectives, location, and cost via the above link, but the training will cover the basics in identifying/treating perinatal mood and anxiety disorders (PMADs)–which include antepartum depression, postpartum depression, postpartum anxiety, postpartum panic disorder, postpartum OCD, postpartum PTSD, and postpartum psychosis–as well as understanding risk factors, treatment options, breastfeeding, consequences of untreated conditions, impact on loved ones, importance of social support, cultural differences, spirituality, etc.

Please attend and/or help spread the word about this training.  It is so, so critical that we ensure as many people as possible are trained so that fewer mothers suffer unnecessarily (like I did) and even worse, fall through the cracks and become another tragic outcome of a perinatal mood disorder.

 

World Maternal Mental Health Day: May 2, 2018

With just a few minutes left to World Maternal Mental Health Day, I wanted to do check one more thing off my TO DO list: Taking a picture with The Blue Dot Project sign with a very important message on it to do my part in spreading awareness about the statistics (1 in 7 new moms), common symptoms, who to call for support/where to find resources & info (Postpartum Support International or PSI), a positive message (the PSI mantra: You’re not alone, this is not your fault, you will get better with the right treatment), and the hashtag #RocktheBlueDot.

 

 

 

 

 

 

 

Earlier in the week, I did the whole Twibbon thing with the #WorldMMHDay on social media, I have been sharing the daily Facebook posts of The Blue Dot Project on both my personal and my author page, and I figured I would wrap up today with this blog post.

With May as Maternal Mental Health Month, keep your eyes open for all sorts of social media campaigns, fundraisers, news articles, and blog posts.  The wealth of information is satisfying to see, as it is 100 times–to say the very least–more than what I had when I found myself stuck all alone and scared on the very difficult postpartum depression (PPD) path I found myself forced to take over 13 years ago!   We need to keep the public awareness going to continue to chip away at the stigma and ignorance that still prevent moms suffering from PPD (and their loved ones) from knowing what to look out for, knowing how to get help, having all medical/mental healthcare professionals that work with moms knowing how to detect/diagnose/refer moms who need help.

Please, please, please do your part to spread awareness.

Click here to find out how you can take your very own #RocktheBlueDot picture with your own message, and share it with the ladies over at The Blue Dot Project so they can share it on their end as well.

Share Postpartum Support International, The Blue Dot Project, and posts by other maternal mental health organizations across the globe.

Join the movement!